January 28, 2020

Back at it….

Well starting yesterday I’m back at serious training, including eating the right way. Two months strict then I’ll cut back and even things out. I’m also back in college classes…19 months to go till graduation!

So I figured I would track my progress back on here…

May 1
AM training
strength train – shoulders
30 min StairMaster
30 min Bike

PM Training
Insanity DVD 30mins
100 push-ups

May 2
60 min Elliptical
100 push-ups

So sick of people opening their mouths and spewing garbage!!

I am so sick of inhumane individuals!!! Seriously you all need to get a life and shut the hell up!!

You see, I have been on both sides of the fence. I have been the overweight girl, the one who every guy wants to pretend to be friends with to get close to her “skinny” friends. I have heard ALL the rude, critical comments people can make…from “you’d be soooo much prettier if you only lost weight” to “you will never find happiness or a man cuz you are fat”.


And now that I have lost weight and have got healthy…now I get the opposite…sometimes I wonder which is worse!! I had a EX-friend of mine from my heavy days ask me to REGAIN my weight cuz when we went out, she no longer got all the attention (can we say shallow)! I have people tell me now that I am TOO skinny and that I have to stop losing weight to just make others happy (i.e., a guy). Or my favorite…the guys that knew me before, who come to me now wanting to date me! Seriously…get a clue!!

You see, I am the same EXACT person I was at 275 as I am at 145!! If anything, I am MUCH wiser and don’t put up with the BS people dish out!!

This is what I think about people who criticise and down graded the people around them. THEY ARE THE ONES WITH ISSUES!! THEY are the ones who are shallow, have low self esteem and are unhappy!

You see it wasn’t that I wanted to be heavy, but life circumstances got to me. I had 2 serious car accidents that left me in a lot of pain. I also had a really bad relationship that caused some crap too. It didn’t matter if someone said negative crap to me or positively lifted me up everyday. I was stuck in this rut…but I liked it there…at the time I felt safe. Well, then my turning point came. And it came out all on its own and that’s when I realized I needed to start making changes in my life for the better…FOR ME…not for anyone else. Though those changes would start affecting the people around me, the biggest…MY DAUGHTER! She would have a mom who would smile more, a mom who would live a lot longer, a mom who wouldn’t tell her, “sorry I am too exhausted to sit up and read with you” (yes, I really said that)! So I took charge and changed my mindset…NOT THE PERSON I WAS.

I love who I am, I am happy with who I am. I also love who I was because it made me appreciate who I am now. Everyone has their vices in life. You can’t make anyone change…it is completely and utterly UP TO THEM!! Do I have things on my body I would like to “fix”..of course…when u are heavy for 14 years…and lose over 100 pounds there is ALOT of loose skin. But I don’t want to do it for vanity purposes, its more because it is uncomfortable and an annoyance. I could even careless how I went from a 36D to a 34B…I would rather spend $45 on a great bra then $7000 on fake boobs, especially when that money can go to my daughters college education! I am not against cosmetic surgery, nor the people who decide to do it. Again, it is their own choice, no one can make it for them! But if you do it (cosmetic surgery)…own it. Don’t try and pretend or act like you busted your ass to look that way. It’s probably why I love Patricia Heaton, she owns it…she has no problem telling the world she has had work done…that is what makes the difference!

Well…I guess this is enough for now. I will keep doing my lunges and glute work to try and give myself an ass, I will continue to do cardio to lower my body fat and I will continue to be the person I always have been…NOT FOR YOU…BUT FOR ME!!! Keep loving yourself and be true to yourself…in the end it is all that matters anyway!! 🙂

CF TOTAL 1 and a little about weight!!

OMG!!! I can’t flipping believe it….I am so excited!!! So excited I had to call Lauren between my Dead Lift 2nd and 3rd attempt to see what I should go for since I already lifted my PR on my 2nd attempt!!

You see this is why!! If you haven’t been keeping up with my blog…I have been COMPLETELY out of commission for 37 days!! DOING NOTHING…and when I say nothing…I mean just the daily routine of life and nothing else. Which SUCKED!!! I was put on strict orders my my doctor during the procedures I was getting done to PLEASE NOT DO CROSSFIT OR ANYTHING ELSE…to just do daily routine things and when ever possible relax in bed…do you know how much that drove me crazy!!?? AAGGHHH!!! Can you hear me screaming through the computer!!

So here I am only back a week…I have only done 2 Strength Trainings before Kevin decides to put up the CF Total 1, the last time we did it was May 18, 2010…so 2 months ago! So I go to the gym and I am actually looking forward to it…I am being positive…if I hit my old PRs…I will be happy! How can I not after the hell I have just been thru with my hip and back…and here I have to do lifts that are ALL HIP AND BACK!!

So here it goes my CF 1 Total ~ Oh by the way did I mention ~


Deadlift 125 ~ 145 ~ 175
Back Squat  135 ~ 145 ~ 175
Shoulder Press 80 ~ 95 ~ 105
TOTAL = 455
Old Total = 390…up 65!!

Hell yeah!!!

Oh yeah and then I ended with a 5k Bike Time:18:49, I also felt good enough so I just continued biking…not for time. This si the first time my legs weren’t going numb so I just pedaled until they did! I made it 10.4 miles!!! My left leg was completely numb and my right the last three toes were dead and it traveled up the outside of my leg…but oh well, that is the LONGEST I have biked since the accident NON STOP! I know it wasn’t on my TREK and it was on a recumbent bike, but who cares…that is a HUGE MILESTONE for me!!!

Yesterday, I did a mini WOD at home cuz I wasn’t feeling to great…
100 sit ups
200 squats
50 burpees
Time: 14:19

Now on to another subject totally off topic…but something I have dealt with over the 37 days that I was laid up and actually a topic I have dealt with MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!
I am so sick and tired of skinny ass chicks or people who think they are healthy and know what the f&(# they are talking about, trash talking people who are overweight. Do I think there are people who lack desire to change, will power, who want the “easy” way out…yes I do. But coming from someone who use to be 275 pounds (yes I was THAT big)! But also someone who before that was athletic, who knew how to take care of herself, but circumstances of life happened. Don’t pass judgement on people when you never walked a day in there shoes. Instead of belittling them, why not sit down and listen to their story! Take a journey with them…you might actually LEARN something from them!! Do I believe that some people are just plain couch potatoes…yep…but I also believe not everyone is born to have that strong will power in them, or to be able to motivate themselves or encourage themselves. How do you know that those people were not let down by the same type of people you are…why in the world would they want ANYTHING to do with you…even if it has to do with being healthy…to them YOU ARE A BITCH, SNOB, JUDGEMENTAL, SELF ABSORD ASS!!! Hell~I wouldn’t want your help or want to be like you…if your aren’t “healthy” on the inside…I really could careless what you look like on the outside!!

When my light bulb finally went off in 2005..I literally was in so much pain trying to lose my weight. I know I did it to myself, so I didn’t care about the pain I had to go through to get it off…I was going to do it, FOR ME!!! And I did!! I didn’t do it to find a guy, I didn’t do it for my butt to look good in jeans, I didn’t go get plastic surgery to fix shit…I am  natural!! I happy with what God has given me…I will work with what I have and make it stronger and healthier to be around for my daughter and to live a life that I want to live….to fulfill MY DREAMS AND GOALS!!!

I guess some people don’t understand because they have never looked death in the face like I have four times, they have never had to overcome huge obstacles without any help, just all on there own…that is when you grow and learn that life is a blessing…every breath you breathe is precious and it is not guaranteed….so don’t judge someone for their outside…because when you do…your inside shines through and it’s not so pretty!!

My thoughts about Steroids and the people who use them….

Steroids…let me start by saying this…I believe that the people who us them for enhancement to gain strength are actually the weakest people in the world!

Let me start with this ~ I wrote this as my status on FB one day : “I love the people who THINK that other people don’t know they take STEROIDS!!! Seriously…do you think we are that stupid? Or are you just THAT DUMB?! All you might have is strength…which is gone the moment you stop…you have NO endurance or technique, you are WEAK…in SO MANY WAYS and you are CHEATING yourself……personally YOU ARE A COMPLETE AND UTTER LOSER!!!”

Now let me back it all up!!

Anabolic steroids, more accurately define as anabolic-androgenic steroids, do, in fact, increase muscle mass when taken by an individual who is training intensely with weights and following an adequate diet (notice I say adequate diet here)! Yet it has not been scientifically shown to to improve athletic performance (I wonder why)!

There are many healthy issues that come with the use of steroids. Steroids damage MANY body organs, including the liver, heart and kidneys (now add individuals who also smoke and drink heavily too)! Long term use of steroids has also been linked to brain cancer.

Steroids enter the bloodstream and are distributed into the muscles as well as the major organs of the body. They then enter the cell membrane of the cytoplasm, once there, they bind to specific receptors and then enter the nucleus of the cell, where they are able to stimulate the production of new proteins.

Steroids also have several side-effects. For example~In the brain, they affect the hypothalamus (which controls hormone levels and results in lower testosterone production in males and cessation of menstruation in females) and the limbic system (which produces change in memory and mood). It reveals that anabolic steroids also impairs learning, promotes aggressiveness, poor impulse control and even violent behavior!

So here is some of the MAIN SIDE EFFECTS of using:
Jaundice, Acne, HIV (from sharing needles), Edema (water retention), Increased Aggression, Headaches, Aching Joints, Reduced HDL, Liver Damage, Liver Cancer, High Blood Pressure, Stroke, and Heart Attack.
Specifically for Males ~ Testicular Atrophy, Breast Tissue Development, Baldness, Impotence, Enlarge Prostate, and Reduced Sperm Count
Specifically for Females ~ Growth of Facial Hair, Deepened Voice, Change in Menstrual Cycle, Breast Reduction, Potential Damage to Fetus

Here is the bad part…if you are “dependant” on them and decide to quit using, you can go through a withdrawal. Some of the symptoms can be depression, impotence and anxiety.

You see this is the reason why I am writing this…all the gyms I ever attended…except for CrossFit…you could walk in and point out each and every individual who was using. I am in a gym now that I can do the same exact thing there! Even my daughter, who is just 11, can do the same! Even some staff are using…makes me want to use a trainer…NOT!!!
Now you are probably wondering why I wrote this…you see I am sick and tired of seeing ROID heads THINK they are all that! THINK they know how to lift! I even like the ones who THINK they can eat whatever…you can’t even see muscle definition because they are more fat than anything else!! I have been through hell and back and yet I do CROSSFIT…bust my ass, push my body PAST the extreme! I love knowing I AM ALL NATURAL…even the flaws…I don’t care!!! I will continue to BUST MY ASS NATURALLY…to be an ELITE ATHLETE NATURALLY!!

Here is the one thing that I know…they might have the strength (while using), but do they have the ability? Do they have the technique? Do they have the endurance? Do they have the will? Do they have the skill? I know I HAVE IT ALL!!!! Do you????

Did I chip a nail?

Ok…so I am going to BITCH before I even start what this blog REALLY needs to be about…so SERIOUSLY can the F%#@ING individuals (both men and woman) get out of the flippin’ gym who aren’t serious about being there, sot he ones who are have more space!!

So I decided today, to go do my WOD on my lunch hour cuz my coach said it would take around 5-7 mins! Then whatever time added on to warm up/do my strength work/cool down, etc!

Well…holy crap…we have Ms. I am lifting a dumbbell that weighs no heavier than the phone she has in her other hand (NO JOKE) and she starts whining that she thinks she just chipped a nail, that she just got done yesterday!! WTF…ARE YOU SERIOUS!!! And what was even funnier, was that these two guys started making fun of her about it, but as soon as she got off the phone, one of them went over to her with his phone and asked if she was ok and asked for her number (meanwhile while waiting for her to get off the phone they weren’t doing shit but watching her…yes fake boobs/no bra, hair not up, make on!)! Neither men, nor woman were sweating!

So here I am now in the middle of my WOD and I have an IDIOT (male gender) come over and take my weight bar…YES the one I am using…the one sitting on the rack with weights on it while I am doing my broad jumps RIGHT NEXT TO IT! The same guy who was sitting on a weight bench (that had an empty weight bar on it) watching me (cuz I saw him in the mirror) doing NOTHING, KNOWING FULL WELL I WAS USING IT…so I was like ummm…excuse I am using it. He said, just like this, “You left the bar…finders keepers”…I said…you touch it, you are gonna find something that you can keep and you aren’t gonna like it…back the hell up! And I finished my WOD! He went back to the weight bench and sat back down and continued to do NOTHING!! WTF!!! (I reported his ass!)

Then as I was stretching/cooling down…I swear I think I had the playboy playmates (trust me they wouldn’t have made the magazine…they ONLY THOUGHT THEY WERE) and their mothers…stretching out in front of me…with no bras and no underwear…yep…I can honestly tell you that!! Can we say they belonged at Babes or Lookers not at the gym!!

Ok…enough BITCHING…now to what I should be bloggin’ about!!!

THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! For the rest day yesterday…My body craved it…actually I think my mind craved it more!!! I did some more volunteering at Adri’s school and spent some mommy/daughter time with her…which is always #1 in my book!!

Food went good yesterday
S~HB egg

Today I am only at lunch, but I added back fruits and veggies and I weighed in!! Can you believe I am gonna post my weight for all to see on the web!! But hey…it is ntohing compared to where I came from!!

So Monday…I told you I almost had a heart attack…well it was because my weight was 160. Before my accident I was 162. So I hadn’t seen the 160’s since Dec 2008…so I was in shock!!! I have done everything in my power with being bed ridden and immobile NOT to gain weight!! So it killed me to see that number!!
So as of this morning I was 152!!! GO ME…8 pounds down!!!

So far today:
S~Blueberry Yogurt w/Fiber (I need this!!!)
L~Chicken w/ Alpha Sprouts/Brocolli

7 rounds For Time: 6:20
6 Squats (125% Body Weight 190lbs) (LMAO…scaled 135lbs…only 89% body weight…I’ll get there)
8 Standing Broad Jumps (I landed FULLY on both legs….WOO HOO!!!! MILE STONE…but hurt like HELL!!)

Strength Work:  5×3
Clean and Jerk  45~50~55~60~65
Snatch  45~50~55~60~65

Another day….tonight time with my bestie!!! 🙂